Kershaw CCL: Kershawrter Country
Chase Utley, 2B
Corey Seager, SS
Justin Turner, 3B
Adrian Gonzalez, 1B
Yasmani Grandal, C
Joc Pederson, CF
Yasiel Puig, RF
Kiké Hernandez, LF
Clayton Kershaw, P
By Jon Weisman
It’s probably the least popular and least productive thing I’ve ever done with my life, though I wish it were the most humiliating.
But ever since Clayton Kershaw made his Major League debut, on May 25, 2008, I’ve pictured every subsequent start as if it were a sequel in a blockbuster movie series.
You just had that feeling about Kershaw, from the very beginning, that he was going to be epic.
The first sequel was Kershaw II: The Kershawing. And it went on from there. Mostly downhill.
Tonight, Kershaw reaches career start No. 250. To commemorate the event — and with deepest apologies — here’s the list of all the titles I’ve created.
So many of them are just awful, truly awful. Some, I really don’t know what I was thinking — even by my lowly standards. Some were repeats, with me having forgotten I had used a title already — sometimes within the same month.
But, what’s done is done, and what’s here is here. At least I haven’t cursed him. And I am happy with the quote I used to introduce him before his first big-league game.
Kershaw CCL: Kershawrter Country
Kershaw CCXLIX: Kershaw-ish
Kershaw CCXLVIII: Kershawt. Elsewhere
Kershaw CCXLVII: Kershawg Day Afternoon
Kershaw CCXLVI: Kershawll We Dance?
Kershaw CCXLV: Kershawter Call Saul
Kershaw XXXLIV: Kershawrace and Pete
Kershaw CCXLIII: Kershawtlight
Kershaw CCXLII: The Kershawrtian
Kershaw CCXLI: Kershawverest
Kershaw CCXL: Kershawlliver’s Travels
Kershaw CCXXXIX: Kershawlk the Line
Kershaw CCXXXVIII: Kershawse Party
Kershaw CCXXXVII: Kershawcean’s 11
Kershaw CCXXXVI: Kershawk in the Woods
Kershaw CCXXXV: Kershawgmalion
Kershaw CCXXXIV: Kershaw Little Romance
Kershaw CCXXXIII: Kershaw Me a Hero
Kershaw CCXXXII: Kershawtizen Kane
Kershaw CCXXXI: Kershawma’s Family
Kershaw CCXXX: Kershawdler on the Roof
Kershaw CCXXIX: Kershawnt-Man
Kershaw CCXXVIII: Kershawt Hot American Summer
Kershaw CCXXVII: Kershawne on One
Kershaw CCXXVI: Kershawming to America
Kershaw CCXXV: Kershawneymoon in Vegas
Kershaw CCXXIV: Kershawmer Pyle, U.S.M.C.
Kershaw CCXXIII: Kershawlicon Valley
Kershaw CCXXII: Kershawrspray
Kershaw CCXXI: Kershawnational Velvet
Kershaw CCXX: Kershawsablanca
Kershaw CCXIX: (unreleased)
Kershaw CCXVIII: The Kershow with David Letterman
Kershaw CCXVII: The Kershawx-Bow Incident
Kershaw CCXVI: Kershawppy Mother’s Day!
Kershaw CCXV: Kershawzing Saddles
Kershaw CCXIV: Kershawl Blart: Mall Cop 2
Kershaw CCXIII: Kershaw vs. the Volcano
Kershaw CCXII: Kershawrk Tank
Kershaw CCXI: Kershawlicon Valley
Kershaw CCX: (unreleased)
Kershaw CCIX: Kershawll Street Blues
Kershaw CCVIII: Kershawsm Buddies
Kershaw CCVII: Kershawrney Miller
Kershaw CCVI: Kershawffice Space
Kershaw CCV: Kershawstbusters
Kershaw CIV: Kershawzing Arizona
Kershaw CCIII: Kershawsablanca
Kershaw CCII: Kershawrk Passage
Kershaw CCI: The Kershawering Inferno
Kershaw CC: Kershawt Tub Time Machine
Kershaw CXCIX: Kershawr Town
Kershaw CXCVIII: The Kershawcial Network
Kershaw CXCVII: Kershawckford Files
Kershaw CXCVI: Kershawll About Eve
Kershaw CXCV: Kershawppalachian Spring
Kershaw CXCIV: Kershawl Miner’s Daughter
Kershaw CXCIII: Kershawmnibus
Kershaw CXCII: Kershawctify
Kershaw CXCI: Kershaw Kings Go
Kershaw CXC: Kershawll the Right Moves
Kershaw CLXXXIX: Kershawnnie Get Your Gun
Kershaw CLXXXVIII: Kershawvity
Kershaw CLXXXVII: Kershawue Detective
Kershaw CLXXXVI: Kershawlexander
Kershaw CLXXXV: Kershawnger Games: Catching Fire
Kershaw CLXXXIV: Kershawphan Black
Kershaw CLXXXIII: Kershawstralia
Kershaw CLXXXII: Kershawvity Falls
Kershaw CLXXXI: Kershawvity
Kershaw CLXXX: Kershawn Jon
Kershaw CLXXIX: Kershawma Mia
Kershaw CLXXVIII: Kershawns of Navarone
Kershaw CLXXVI: Kershawrks and Recreation
Kershaw CLXXV: Kershawll in the Family
Kershaw CLXXIV: Kershowse Encounters of the Third Kind
Kershaw CLXXIII: Kershawd Couple
Kershaw CLXXII: Kershawky Mountain High
Kershaw CLXXI: Kershawrd Day’s Night
Kershaw CLXX: Kershawperation Petticoat
Kershaw CLXIX: Kershawrknado
Kershaw CLXVIII: Kershawn Her Majesty’s Secret Service
Kershaw CLXVII: Kershawnder the Dome
Kershaw CLXVI: Kershawmp and Circumstance
Kershaw CLXV: Kershawnderama
Kershaw CLXIV: (unreleased)
Kershaw CLXIII: (unreleased)
Kershaw CLXII: Kershawrdergarten Cop
Kershaw CLXI: Kershawjak
Kershaw CLX: Kershawneas and Ferb
Kershaw CLIX: Kershawr Wars
Kershaw CLVIII: Kershawo, Pioneers
Kershaw CLVII: Kershawt in the Hat
Kershaw CLVI: Kershawro Dark Thirty
Kershaw CLV: Kershawp with People
Kershaw CLIV: Kershawnce Upon a Time in America
Kershaw CLIII: Kershawrgo
Kershaw CLII: Kershawvanhoe
Kershaw CLI: Kershawrgo
Kershaw CL: Kershawn the Waterfront
Kershaw CXLIX: (unreleased)
Kershaw CXLVIII: (unreleased)
Kershaw CXLVII: (unreleased)
Kershaw CXLVI: Kershaw Among the Ruins
Kershaw CXLV: Kershawncle Bill the Sailor
Kershaw CXLIV: Kershawchtung Baby
Kershaw CXLIII: Kershawrvest Time
Kershaw CXLII: Kershawleanna
Kershaw CXLI: Kershaw Vie en Rose
Kershaw CXL: Kershawn Her Majesty’s Secret Service
Kershaw CXXXIX: Kershawtime at the Apollo
Kershaw CXXXVIII: Kershamen Corner
Kershaw CXXXVII: Kershuwnger Games
Kershaw CXXXVI: Kershawmdog Millionaire
Kershaw CXXXV: Kershawma Lama Ding Dong
Kershaw CXXXIV: Kershawn Golden Pond
Kershaw CXXXIII: Kershawctupus’ Garden
Kershaw CXXXII: Kershawn the Waterfront
Kershaw CXXXI: KershaR2D2
Kershaw CXXX: Kershawtter Pops
Kershaw CXXIX: Kershawl of Me
Kershaw CXXVIII: Kershmokey and the Bandit
Kershaw CXXVII: (unreleased)
Kershaw CXXVI: Kershaw I Met Your Mother
Kershaw CXXV: Kershnakes on a Plane
Kershaw CXXIV: Kershawpolitan
Kershaw CXXIII: Kershmeatballs
Kershaw CXXII: Kershawut of Africa
Kershaw CXXI: KershawSI
Kershaw CXX: Kershawrvin Gardens
Kershaw CXIX: Kershawstakovich
Kershaw CXVIII: Kershawmazing Grace
Kershaw CXVII: Kerhsawrfegnugen
Kershaw CXVI: Kershawpalong Cassidy
Kershaw CXV: Kershawp on Pop
Kershaw CXIV: Kershowpe Floats
Kershaw CXIII: Kershawpollo 13
Kershaw CXII: Kershawmedeus
Kershaw CXI: Kershawld Man River
Kershaw CX: Kershomon
Kershaw CIX: Kershawl in the Family
Kershaw CVIII: Kershawp in the Air
Kershaw CVII: (unreleased)
Kershaw CVI: Kersharrrrgh!
Kershaw CV: Kershawmedeus
Kershaw CIV: Kershawrks and Recreation
Kershaw CIII: Kersharmageddon and the Deathly Hollows
Kershaw CII: Kershawneyball
Kershaw CI: Kershaweois Gentilhomme
Kershaw C: Kersh of the Titans
Kershaw XCIX: Kershawl the President’s Men
Kershaw XCVIII: Kershawl That Heaven Will Allow
Kershaw XCVII: Kershawpular Mechanics
Kershaw XCVI: Kershawft
Kershaw XCV: Kershawnal Best
Kershaw XCIV: Kershawlotte’s Web
Kershaw XCIII: Kershawl We Are Saying, Is Give Peace a Chance
Kershaw XCII: Kersh-sh-sh-sh-sh Changes
Kershaw XCI: Kershawppy Mother’s Day
Kershaw XC: (unreleased)
Kershaw LXXXIX: Kershawlistic Medicine
Kershaw LXXXVIII: Kershawtel California
Kershaw LXXXVII: Kershawrlan County, U.S.A.
Kershaw LXXXVI: Kershawlandaise Sauce
Kershaw LXXXV: Kershawberry Muffin
Kershaw LXXXIV: Kershopening Day Game Chat
Kershaw LXXXIII: Kershawteau Marmont
Kershaw LXXXII: Kershawpscotch
Kershaw LXXXI: Kershawctupus
Kershaw LXXX: Kershawt wheels
Kershaw LXXIX: Kershawquaman
Kershaw LXXVIII: (unreleased)
Kershaw LXXVII: Kershaw, Snap!
Kershaw LXXVI: Kershawnna Karenina
Kershaw LXXV: Kershawne on you crazy diamond
Kershaw LXXIV: Kershasta McNasty
Kershaw LXXIII: Kershawl of Me
Kershaw LXXII: Kershawmpty Dumpty
Kershaw LXXI: Kershawt and a beer
Kershaw LXX: Kershawt Tub Time Machine
Kershaw LXIX: Kershallow Grave
Kershaw LXVIII: Kershawk jock
Kershaw LXVII: O Kershaw, Curtain, Lights
Kershaw LXVI: Kershawpoly
Kershaw LXV: Kershawnee, Indiana
Kershaw LXIV: Kershaw Knight Pulliam
Kershaw LXIII: Kershawt My Dad Says
Kershaw LXII: Kershawrmor All
Kershaw LXI: Kershawrms and the Man
Kershaw LX: Kershawlsbury Hill
Kershaw LIX: Kershaws Clay
Kershaw LVIII: Kershawmmie dearest
Kershaw LVII: Kershawww, freak out!
Kershaw LVI: (unreleased)
Kershaw LV: Kershawk-infested waters
Kershaw LIV: Kershaw the Frog
Kershaw LIII: Kershawme Opener
Kershaw LII: There’s No Business Like Kershaw Business
Kershaw LI: (unreleased)
Kershaw L: Kershawlk to the animals
Kershaw XLIX: Kershaws
Kershaw XLVIII: Kershome run derby
Kershaw XLVII: Kershawpple Dumpling Gang
Kershaw XLVI: Kershawlly olly oxen free
Kershaw XLV: Kershawlly Lolly Lolly get your adverbs here
Kershaw XLIV: Kershawvinist pigs!
Kershaw XLIII: Kershawk Full o’ Nuts
Kershaw XLII: (unreleased)
Kershaw XLI: Kershawk treatment
Kershaw XL: Drive Kershow, Putt for Dough
Kershaw XXXIX: Kershow Gabba Gabba
Kershaw XXXVIII: Kershawrky’s Machine
Kershaw XXXVII: Kershawt Through the Heart
Kershaw XXXVI: Kershawp ’Til You Drop
Kershaw XXXV: Kershawppy Father’s Night
Kershaw XXXIV: Kershalways Be Closing
Kershaw XXXIII: Kershawt Heard ‘Round the World
Kershaw XXXII: Kershawva Nagila
Kershaw XXXI: Kershawt People Got No Reason
Kershaw XXX: Kershawffice Space
Kershaw XXIX: Kershawrk Attack
Kershaw XXVIII: Kershampoo
Kershaw XXVII: Kershantilly Lace
Kershaw XXVI: Kershey’s Kisses
Kershaw XXV: Kershawt in the Dark
Kershaw XXIV: Kershawffle off to Buffalo
Kershaw XXIII: Kersham-Wow
Kershaw XXII: (unreleased)
Kershaw XXI: Kershama Lama Ding Dong
Kershaw XX: Kershane, Come Back Kershane
Kershaw XIX: Kershawrp Dressed Man
Kershaw XVIII: Kershawnterbury Tales
Kershaw XVII: Kershawt in the Dark
Kershaw XVI: Kershawnce To Dream
Kershaw XV: Kershawn of the Dead
Kershaw XIV: Kershawl We Dance?
Kershaw XIII: Kershawp Around the Corner
Kershaw XII: Kerdyshawck
Kershaw XI: Manny I
Kershaw X: Kershaq Fu
Kershaw IX: Kershawk the Monkey
Kershaw VIII: Kershaw Me the Money
Kershaw VII: Kershaw Na Na Na, Sha Na Na Na Na Na
Kershaw VI: Kershaw’s, Foiled Again?
Kershaw V: (unreleased)
Kershaw IV: Kershawshank Redemption
Kershaw III: Kershawker
Kershaw II: The Kershawing
Kershaw
Don Bright
So Kike can start against a righty, but Thompson can’t? Look I’m not saying he should be the everyday LF, but he should start in the OF somewhere until he cools down, it’s not like the other OF’s (except maybe Joc) are killing it right now.
Jon Weisman
Thompson is starting tomorrow against Wacha.
Don Bright
That’s good, he deserves as much of a shot as anyone else at the moment
Michael Green
More musicals, Jon!
pigstown
Thank you for the course in Roman numerals
dembums55
What about Kershawstin Powers: The Guy who K’d me?
Jon Lyons
I don’t know why it resonated with me at the time, but I always remember: Kershaw IV: Kershawshank Redemption. Keep the sequels coming!